Love and other things

And so we've landed on the 18th day of this challenge which means I'm more then halfway through, yaay me! Hahaha, I'm listening to Il Divo's - Hallelujah which sometimes makes me very happy because those guys have like these amazing voices. My mom really loves them. My hamster was terrorizing my desk an hour ago, she's such an amazing creature! Well lets get down to business.
Day 18
A picture of your biggest insecurity
A problem that you have had
My biggest insecurity is my body. I don't feel comfortable around most people wearing tight things or a bikini so I kind off avoid being in those situations. This insecurity reflects on my everyday life which means that I'm very insecure when I'm surrounded by people or by a person I like because I'm afraid of what they might think of me. Also it really really reflects on my lovelife, since my former boyfriend called me fat and mentioned that I should fitniss more and drink less.. (He was the one getting fat...) Anyway, I actually cover my insecurity not by wearing a lot of makeup but by trying to be a little distaned from people, especially the boy I like, I always try to make myself look horrible so that someone won't try so hard to get to know me so that I won't have to be afraid of what they might think of me. Nowadays I try not to be so insecure but it's a really hard battle to win so. To all the girls out there sharing this problem, try and keep trying because we're all worth it even though we think we're not!

Well it took Blogspot forever to upload this picture! Haha this is the most recent picture of me complete, I've just noticed that I never take pictures that show more than my upper body... Sorry for that!
A problem that I've had... I've got a really really reaaaaaaaaaaaally long list but won't bother you guys with it. A problem I've had for a very long time was trusting people since everyone I've ever trusted stabbed me in the back so. Anyway I've got a little bit of a trustissue, especially when I comes to boys, which can get so severe that they actually think I hate boys. I don't hate them I'm only scared to let someone in which makes liking me one hell of a difficult job! Right now I trust a few people and I know they know I trust them. I'm trying to figure out if someone is worth my trust right now, this boy, he has been a really great guy and been pulling up with me for like 2 months now I think. I do wonder how he can just laugh at me for being stupid and insecure without me feeling like a complete idiot, though sometimes I think WFT are you laughing about I know I'm stupid. But that's every now and than. I really do enjoy his company and he's a really nice guy but I'm still not sure though. We'll see where time takes us! That is one tiny little thing I'd like to say to you. Whenever you're unsure about something, like love, you should try to let it go and just go with it without overthinking it because that'll only make it so much harder.
That's it for todays challenge and so euhm bye!
Takecare,
Rawrpinguin